The last scraps of summer are hanging on in Oregon, and you can already feel the pumpkin-spice-everything takeover creeping in. Lattes, candles, air fresheners, pretty soon even your goddamn dog’s shampoo will smell like pumpkin spice. But before we all surrender to the seasonal onslaught, I’m still soaking up the warm evenings and pretending this weather will last through Thanksgiving.
On my end, Hood to Coast is just around the corner. Training’s been good, my knees are actually improving. Didn’t see that one coming. And Maddie? She’s been complaining like a pro-level teenager, with eye rolls, sighs, the whole Broadway performance. But let’s be real: I know she’s low-key excited. She’ll act annoyed the whole way, then brag about it after. Meanwhile, I’m just pumped to drag her ass across Oregon with me, because sharing the misery is half the fun.
Portland’s Top Public Schools (a.k.a. Places Kids Actually Learn Stuff)
Picking the right school can feel like speed-dating with Zillow tabs open in the background, because let’s be honest, half the reason people move is “better schools.” The good news is that Portland actually has some pretty solid options. These aren’t the kind of schools where kids just learn how to make TikToks and dodge PE. These are the spots where your kid might actually get smarter than you before they can drive.
Alameda Elementary
Located in the postcard-perfect Alameda neighborhood of NE Portland where tree-lined streets and classic Craftsman homes give off that timeless Portland charm. This school is consistently one of the best in Portland Public. They’ve got strong academics, a gifted program, and test scores that prove the kids are actually learning and not just TikToking in class. If you live here, congrats — your kids are probably going to outsmart you by 5th grade.
Forest Park Elementary
This one’s tucked up in the West Hills of NW Portland. Big houses, big trees, big “we shop at New Seasons only” energy. With some of the highest test scores in the state, Forest Park is basically a flex for parents who casually drop, “Oh yeah, my kid goes there” at dinner parties. Bonus: the neighborhood looks like a Zillow ad, so at least your drive to drop-off feels fancy.
Rieke Elementary
Down in Southwest, you’ve got Rieke — smaller, tight-knit, and solid as hell. Test scores are strong, the programs are legit, and they even have things like a Garden Club and Chess Club, which, let’s face it, are just code for “raising nerds who will probably be running a tech company in 20 years.” Hillsdale’s the kind of neighborhood where you know your barista by name and everyone has a Subaru.
Top School Districts (Where the Herd Migrates)
Portland Public Schools (PPS)
It’s the big one. Covers the city, offers everything from language immersion to art programs, and has the kind of variety that means your kid could either become a future Nobel laureate or…a future street magician. Roll the dice.
Beaverton School District (BSD)
BSD is the land of “option schools,” which is code for “parents willing to camp out at info nights to fight for a transfer.” They’ve got magnet schools for artsy kids, brainy kids, science kids — you name it. Honestly, BSD is like a damn buffet.
Hillsboro School District
Let’s be honest: people move out this way for more house and a yard the dog can actually shit in. But don’t sleep on the schools — solid options and growing programs, plus it feeds into BASE, which we’ll get to in a second.
Private & Specialty Schools (a.k.a. Where Tuition is a Mortgage Payment)
Catlin Gabel – Elite, progressive, outdoorsy, and the kind of place where kids learn coding and climbing ropes before they lose their baby teeth.
Oregon Episcopal School (OES) – Great academics, ethical leadership, and the kind of community vibe where everyone’s kid plays cello or skis.
Jesuit High School – If you want discipline, prestige, and a college-prep boot camp with sports teams that actually win stuff.
Northwest Academy – For the creative souls who’d rather paint murals than run laps.
BASE — My Family’s Nerd Heaven
Here’s where I get personal: Beaverton Academy of Science & Engineering (BASE). Both my daughters go here, and while there’s no football team or school play, they’ve got enough academic horsepower to put NASA interns to shame.
- Three badass tracks: Computer Science, Engineering, Biomedical.
- 100% on-time graduation rate. (Yeah, all of them. Unlike my high school gym class.)
- Kids who are obsessed with STEM, not pep rallies.
Our experience has been killer. If your kid is into science or tech, skip the Friday-night lights — send them here.
So yeah, summer’s clock is running out. Pumpkin spice is lurking like a basic bitch horror movie villain, and your kids are about to sharpen pencils they’ll never use because everything’s on an iPad now. But if you’re raising a family in Portland, you’ve got some seriously good school choices — whether you want neighborhood charm, private-school bragging rights, or a STEM-nerd paradise like BASE.
Pray for me as I’ll be pounding pavement in Hood to Coast this weekend with knees that are shockingly still attached and a teenager who’ll complain the whole way — until she doesn’t. That finish line will feel good, even if I have to bribe her with Dutch Bros after.
